This is it.
I am heading to Chicago in less than 24 hours and am trying to put my finger on my current emotional state – excited, nervous, happy, apprehensive..I am excited to be going to run my first marathon and I am spending more time reflecting on how I was pre-surgery…it wasn’t easy living in my body pre-dbs and it was at times painful and uncomfortable. To be able to get on this flight to run this race, is truly a miracle of modern science…as I reflected today I remembered to re-read my stanford essay — this was the last paragraph…
In response to the question “What Matters Most to Me”: Each day matters to me, even the bad ones; my family, my friends, my health and my career matter, in that order. Despite all my frustrations, I can always sit back and remind myself that I have been very successful in my career and I know the best is yet to come. I still daydream about running a marathon and hope that one day they will find a cure for Dystonia. What matters most? I want to win this fight. I want to destroy this monster that has attacked my body. And if I don’t, so be it. I’m the lucky one.
As far as I am concerned, I have already won the fight…if you see me on the course this weekend, please high five me, if you see my cry hand me a tissue, those are tears of gratitude of being able to run a marathon.
Thank you to everyone for all the kind words of encouragement. This race isn’t for me, it is for everyone that isn’t as lucky as me, it is for Brianna, it is for every child, parent and family member that has seen this disease change lives. For me, this disease has helped me grow into the runner I am today!
And most of all thank you to my sister Suzie who is always cheering me on and inspires me everyday when she hops on the treadmill….
2 thoughts on “October 6, 2011”
Go Carrie Go! I got a chance to read through your blogs and they brought tears to my eyes. It was so sweet of you to mention Breanna! I can’t wait to show her when she gets home from school. I told Suzie that every time Bre’s shoes light up I think of the both of you. Where you ever able to figure out a way to b’dazzle your shoes?
Just know that we will be cheering for you from Michigan! I will make sure that Bre is wearing the shoes all day in honor of you! Good Luck and stay safe!
Go Carrie!! I am sending you positive vibes!!!! From a fellow Dystonian. ~Tracy