July 29, 2013

Living life with a disability, “taking care of myself”, retirement

Life is always interesting, life with a disability is sometimes just a party!  You never know when you are going to get your next surprise….I have been training so hard for my next half marathons – gaining speed, losing weight, feeling great…but my Dystonia gave me a surprise…I saw the signs, but as always I ignored them…I thought I must just be tired..take a day off…then the signs couldn’t be ignored and I realized all this training and running may be too much for my body.  That I would only run 5 more half marathons, and then I am done, I will retire…

Then I had an epiphany this weekend, who am I kidding…I will be retiring this year.  This was a painful decision for me and I am not even a professional athlete.  I have always wanted to do the Nike womans half and the SF half over the bridge and then that’s it…I am done!  Tears are streaming down my face as I write this…but I can’t keep on putting my family, friends and work through these cycles of not feeling well.  I’ll cap my races at 10Ks and be happy with just being fit and healthy.

I have ran more halfs than most of my friends and I should be proud of that.  I remember when I set out on this journey I said to Dr.T if this surgery works I would be so happy running a 10K…so here I am at the circle of life…started with a 10K worked my way to half and even a full marathon, completed the tough mudder and got the most respect reward, so I have had an awesome almost 8 years of training for various half marathons and other races but 2013 is my time to call it quits.  November 3rd will be my last, I will be crying for so many reasons when I cross that finish line, but I know this is the right thing to do.

I am finally understanding what taking care of myself means – being proud of my accomplishments and celebrating small wins!  I can’t wait to cheer others on who decide to run for the DMRF in my name or for others…I can’t wait to get back to running 10Ks…and even though I am nearing the end, I can truly say I had an awesome time inspiring others, training with the ones I love and having the ability to say i have ran a marathon…

For my readers, please follow the rest of my journey for my last 2 half marathons here and this isn’t the end, there will be other adventures ahead..I just have to listen to my body now and take care of myself!

xoxo…

Run Carrie Run!

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