September 5, 2013

My retirement, it isn’t often that I reflect about my Dystonia but tonight is one of those rare nights.  I have had many business people in the last several days come up to me and say I am honored to work with someone like you, I understand why you work so hard, I understand why you are such a good friend…none of these sentences made sense to me why my blog help them understand me until I started thinking about it.  I run for those that can’t…simply said, my body, my Dystonia has transformed my physical self and instead been a vehicle to raise awareness for those that will never be as lucky as me.  In this whole journey of almost 8 years, I never thought twice about running for the little 12 year old that wakes up and realizes they are in a “twisted” life and that I am wearing my body out to raise awareness for them.  It never once crossed my mind, for a while I thought it was for my own ego but I realized it was never about the medals.  It was always about trying to give my own little 12 year old body a voice, a voice to be heard that Dystonia never slowed me down.  It was always about my inspiring my sister to walk a mile, which she did…it was always about using the good fortune I was given to spread the word that you can still be beautiful and amazing despite having a rare disease.  So as much as I am “retiring” I will never stop running for the disease, it just may be in different ways.  Helping little kids be inspired is my dream, living a selfless life to inspire others is my dream…I once thought it was running a marathon, but that was a metaphor for my life’s goal with Dystonia…my goal is to show every person with Dystonia or any other disease…that a disease is not a life sentence of gloom, it is a lesson, an opportunity to use these “superpowers” to make a difference in other people’s lives.  So as much I am training for my last 2 long races, this isn’t the end of runcarrierun, it is simply a change of pace, a change of race, I will never stop being an advocate for a looking for a cure to this disease.  And for everyone that says the are inspired by me, I am inspired by everyone that reads this blog, that tries a race because of me and most importantly inspired in everyone that believes in me!